I Must Say I Do

Hello. I am at my kampong when I wrote this post. It really is a good experience, being in a place where I can’t access any connection with the World Wide Web. Well, as usual, I would sit with my family, hearing stories and sometimes interrupt. But today, I have something interesting to share. At least, the gist of our conversation.

How do we define marriage? Some cultures would say that marriage is just a form of formality to officiate that two souls are now together. Some says that marriage is a ceremony, to legalise sex between two people. Some sees it as a process which says that you are ready to commit to your better half. No matter how you define marriage, it should not be taken lightly.

In an Indian family, marriage is so sacred that a couple should have the blessing of both sides. No matter how much in love they are, a nod must be given by the family in order to further their relationship. For some, an arranged marriage will be done. This way, the child would have no choice but to marry the man/woman that the parents had chosen.

In contrast with that, western civilisation sees marriage in a lighter mood. No, not that they took the matter lightly, but rather in a cheerful manner. Love is put first. It is the couple who’s about to control their fate, not the parents. So, family doesn’t play much role in choosing their soul mate. But, I believe that they too feel the importance of family blessing before taking their relationship a step ahead, relatively speaking, marriage life.

As for the Malays, we have put some of this and thats. Therefore, the pros would cover the cons of each side. I’d say, however it is, it is a humungous matter to handle. But many took it lightly. Why? Because it’s easy to get more. Love is just a game, to them. That is why people are having problems relating to marriage at any given country.

Ever heard of domestic violence? A guy would beat up the wife, rape her and force her to do many dreadful stuff. The lady would be considered as nothing, just a piece of meat. How can this happen? Any human has the same amount of dignity, pride and value as the others. But when love took over, whatever the man said, is a command to the wife. I condemn this act as when you take each other, both deserve the treatment of love, and compassion.

What about adultery? I’m so sorry to say this but British movies and stories depict a lot of this despicable act in their society. I’m talking from experience. A’s wife is having an affair with B’s husband; C is having an affair with D’s daughter, so on and so forth. What happen to being faithful? Has the word commitment gone missing from the Oxford’s Dictionary? Pity the guy/lady who’s faithful to the other. They looked so stupid for staying so long with a person that does not even value them enough.

What about multiple marriages? Ha, this one is popular among the Malay community. It is true that it is sunnah to marry for women at one time, but it must be done accordingly. You have the wage of a factory worker, but a lust of a horse, that does not permit you to marry more than one time. If you have the power, the capability to do it, then it is okay. The consent of the wife/wives is important too. The result of which multiple marriages is done quietly is that World War III arises earlier before it is expected.

However it is, treat it as a holy process. It combines two soul to become one, and say that you are ready to have your life spent with your other half fully. Love is not a game. That’s why people are stressed to look carefully, so to choose the best person for them. But I believe, everyone has their own soul mate. So, to worry about not having one is unnecessary. Till next time.